Bubble Football Showdown: 10 rule-breaking differences

Number one rule in Bubble Football. There are NO rules! Well, there are I was being a bit dramatic but you can certainly get away with a lot more than the traditional game of football.
The giant zorb slides over your head and with it comes a special set of powers. Are you able to harness the power of zorb or will the power get to your head?
The bubble lets you safely torpedo people into the air (about 10ft into the air in some cases). Lucky for the poor guy or girl on the receiving end it is like landing on a giant pillow. So every smash and bash you inflict on people is completely GUILT FREE!
So Spartacus Bubble Soccer is going to compare the traditional 10 basic rules of football against the 10 basic rules of Bubble Football. Here we go!
1. Aim of Football Game
FOOTBALL:
The main objective in football is to score more goals than the opposing team.
BUBBLE FOOTBALL:
The main objective in bubble football is to obliterate the opposing team.
2. The Players
FOOTBALL
The number of players and positions in each team should not exceed eleven (11). But, there must be one player nominated as a goalkeeper in each team.
BUBBLE FOOTBALL
The number of players and positions can vary – make it up as you go along. There is no nominated goalkeeper, if you want 10 goalies then fine if you want zero goalies also fine.
3. Scoring Goals
FOOTBALL
A goal results when the ball enters the goalmouth and crosses the goal line. Unsporting and inflammatory behaviour for goal celebrations may result in yellow or red cards.
BUBBLE FOOTBALL
A goal results when the ball enters the goalmouth and crosses the goal line. Unsporting and inflammatory behaviour for goal celebrations may result in a statue being built in your honor.
4. Basic Soccer Regulations
FOOTBALL
Generally, a foul is the use of excessive force or an outfield player handling the ball. Fouls and misconduct during the game usually result in disciplinary action. The referee uses caution cards to administer disciplinaries.
BUBBLE FOOTBALL
Excessive force may result in your opponent being rolled 50ft down the pitch or rocketed into the sky and you will not face any disciplinary action for this.
5. Football Referee and Officials
FOOTBALL
Referees are also responsible for maintaining respect and sportsmanship from the players.
BUBBLE FOOTBALL
The referee has one job. If someone gets stuck upside down they push them back onto their feet.
6. Playing Field Dimensions
FOOTBALL:
The playing field must adhere to specific dimensions, with marked lines and boundaries.
BUBBLE FOOTBALL:
The playing field can be as flexible as a stretch armstrong toy. It can be indoors, outdoors, or even on bumpy terrain. Boundaries are merely suggestions, and lines may be blurred both literally and figuratively.
7. Offside Rule
FOOTBALL:
In football, players can be called offside if they are closer to the opponent’s goal line than both the ball and the second-to-last defender when the ball is played to them.
BUBBLE FOOTBALL:
Offside is a term as foreign as a talking unicorn in the land of bubble football. With no offside rule to hinder your strategic manoeuvres, you’re free to roam the field like a bubble-bound renegade.
8. Throw-ins
FOOTBALL:
When the ball goes out of bounds on the sidelines, the opposing team is awarded a throw-in to put the ball back into play.
BUBBLE FOOTBALL:
Throw-ins transform into laugh-ins in the realm of bubble football. When the ball takes a detour outside the playing area, it’s an opportunity to steal a surprise assault on your rival, sending them crashing to the ground in a bewildered heap.
9. Yellow and Red Cards
FOOTBALL:
Yellow and red cards are used to caution or send off players for serious fouls or misconduct.
BUBBLE FOOTBALL:
In bubble football, the only colour that matters is the rainbow of laughter that fills the air. No need for caution or ejections here.
10. Referee Decisions
FOOTBALL:
Referees have the final say in making decisions and resolving disputes on the field.
BUBBLE FOOTBALL:
In the whimsical world of bubble football, the referee’s decision-making prowess takes on a different flavour. Disputes are often resolved through impromptu bubble showdown, much like the ones you see in the epic ice hockey clashes.
The Final Whistle
So, there you have it. The 10 Basic rules of Bubble Football. Not quite as expansive as the 1000 page manual as The Football Association (FA) rulebook. But, 1000 times more entertaining, I would bet.
We, the Spartacus Bubble Soccer, want to hear what you think. Share this with friends, help us make even more absurd rules and finally don’t forget to join the I AM SPARTACUS fan club below and get exclusive access to behind the scenes and content.
Have an idea for a new rule? Want us to compare a certain football rule to bubble football? Well we want to hear it. It may even make our list (we are adding another 10 very soon) Contact us here and we’ll get to work!